RAWRRRRRR

NEW LAYOUT TIME!!! I have a big photoshoot tomorrow with Derek. Our friend Liz is shooting some amazing photos of us, and I plan on changing my myspace up a bit! I also need updated pictures with my new hair =P (well not so new anymore I guess...lol) but anywho Derek and I made a "goth Christmas" scene for the shoot:






I designed the stockings on the black web thing with the white spider web >_> It's fierce. Plus had to work without a fireplace, but I think it suits perfectly. The tree is white wrapped with pink lights! It also has black, purple, silver, skull, and nightmare before christmas ornaments! My favorite part of the whole tree is the star! Of course its not like one you've ever seen before since its a spider hanging down from a web from the ceiling onto the top of the tree. Of course after the photoshoot there should be a ton of better photos of it!


I'll keep you all posted!

xoxo Matthew

Poem?

Read this little poem, I love it. No, I didn't write it


If i dont call you

[ Its because im waiting for you to call me ]

When i walk away from you mad

[ Follow me ]

When i stare at your mouth

[ Kiss me ]

When i push you or hit you

[ Grab me and dont let go ]

When i call you and say i cant sleep

[stay on the phone till i go to sleep]

When i start cussing at you

[ Kiss me and tell me you love me ]

When im quiet

[ Ask me whats wrong ]

When i ignore you

[ Give me your attention ]

When i pull away

[ Pull me back ]

When you see me at my worst

[ Tell me im beautiful ]

When you see me start crying

[ Hold me and tell me everything will be alright ]

When you see me walking

[ Sneak up and hug my waist from behind ]

When im scared

[ Protect me ]

When i lay my head on your shoulder

[ Tilt my head up and kiss me ]

When i grab at your hands

[ Hold mine and play with my fingers ]

When i tease you

[ Tease me back and make me laugh ]

When i dont answer for a long time

[ reassure me that everything is okay ]

When i look at you with doubt

[ Back yourself up ]

When i say that i love you

[ I really do more than you could understand ]

When i bump into you

[ bump into me back and make me laugh ]

When i tell you a secret

[ keep it safe and untold ]

When i look at you in your eyes

[ dont look away until i do ]

When i miss you

[ im hurting inside ]

When you break my heart

[ the pain never really goes away ]

When i say its over

[ i still want you to be mine ]

Well hello there!

So last night while watching the New Moon red carpet premiere on Myspace, I missed the Jay Leno interview with him >_< but it's whatevs cause I saw him and his adorable voice talk =D



Yea single life is getting better and better by the second! I can finally just live in a fantasy world for a little bit and not have to worry about relationship drama.

But theres still one drama...MOVING! OMG like seriously I move in like 12 days and I'm so not going to be able to go to California. I simply cannot get all my stuff there >_> It's too pricey, and because of the economy there's no money to borrow from anyone. I seriously need a sugar daddy! LOL I just thought of my friend Wade...idk why. Most of you know him from the Stickam chatroom. Which has been going well since I get to add them to my bulletins and websites and it creates a ton of lurkers!

Check this out!!!



YEAYA b!tches back on top!

Most viewed yesterday...this week...this month...all thanks to you!

I'm making a new video with Derek tomorrow hopefully since he has the day off. New YouTube video is long overdue. I was banging them out back to back that one month, now I've been so stressed over everything that's happening.

Plus I talked to my friend Joe Brooks, as well as others, and we agreed to not release my Last Forever song. It's just not good. I producted it myself... my friend made the beats... and well it's just so rough. When I move back to Cali I will be working non stop and saving up some money to get a good producer to do songs I know you'll love! Either that or find a financial backing or someone to loan me. (Yet again being held back by money. It really does make the world go round!)Sorry again for delays in music. I promise you the produced songs will make you want to get up and dance!!! Plus, who wants to hear a lousy breakup song anyway!?! hahaha.

I can't wait till I'm back in California getting a tan and bleaching my hair to blond. It's been so long, and I'm just soooooooooo excited!!! I hope everything works out!!! Thank you everyone for all your support!

xoxo Matthew

The hardest part of breaking up...

...is getting back your stuff. lol I added the song to my Myspace. idk If I'll ever get to see my new gps, my Versace sunglasses, or my old iPhone ever again.

Oh well, moving on!!! California in three weeks!!! But is it happening!?!? Seems like everything right now is going oh so wrong. Cards just aren't being put into place. But hopefully everything will come together. I have faith that my friends will help me, and things will run somewhat smoothly. ::crosses fingers::



I dyed my hair. It's like light brown / dark blond. Have to start transitioning to lighter ;) So it can be kinda like this next year:



NO H8, LOVE IS GONNA SAVE US necklaces and YOU SMOKING IS GIVING US BOTH CANCER shirts are back on sale. I had a bunch of complaints when they sold out, so grab it now before it does again. With the move and all idk if I can restock after they go out...lol. Just being honest O_O head over to http://matthewlush.bigcartel.com to get some now!

Umm so I need to start blogging more, Yeliz you need to nag me about it. IDC if I'm not in the mood, motivate me to move foward. That's what friends are for! We cannot simply dwell on the past.

I have a new song called "Last Forever" which was suppose to be out by now, but I keep trying to record it over and over to sound better. Once it's edited it'll be at http://www.myspace.com/matthewlush ...add it if you haven't already! It's a demo and edited by me, but it's better than nothing right? As long as I let my emotions go and have fun with it, that's all that matters to me.

Hope you have a good one!

xoxo Matthew